corrections

or

“what have we learned, kids?”

that the web is full of half-truths and full lies

tv guide, 2004

We were shooting Season 2 of “Oobi” and I was doing double duty - “Oobi” by day, AVENUE Q by night. One night, Uma Thurman came backstage after seeing Q and I asked for a photo with her, as did everyone else in the cast. After someone took a photo of the two of us for me, I asked for one more...and told her I’d explain after. I rolled up my sleeve and put up my hand (thinking that I would Photoshop eyes on my hand later so I could have a photo of Uma and Uma) and a second shot was taken. Then this exchange occurred:

ME:  See, the reason I did that was because I play a character named Uma on a show called “Oobi,” which is actually just my hand with eyes on it --

MS. THURMAN: Oh, I know who Uma is.

ME: Really?!? Oh wow!

And that was about it.

The next morning, I went to the “Oobi” set and told everyone how “Uma” had met Uma...without exaggeration. There happened to be some Noggin execs there that day. They were very happy.

A few months after “Oobi” wrapped, I was interviewed via phone for a TV Guide article. I was immediately asked about the Uma-Uma story. I suppose someone had tipped them off. Anyway, I told the story, again, without exaggeration.

Imagine my chagrin when I read the article above, published months later, which basically told the readers that Uma Thurman had asked me to take a photo with her because she was a fan. Not true, gentle readers. NOT TRUE. In fact, damned unbelievable. I mean come ON. How the hell does that happen? A movie star asking some unknown puppeteer for a photo?

To be fair, my quote is indeed my actual quote, just taken out of context. But everything else regarding the Uma story is an incorrect, false, making-the-story-more-interesting-than-it-actually-is inference.

Worse, the article has become a source that people cull from as fact about myself, the character, the show, and Uma Thurman. Again, folks, I APPROACHED HER. Not the other way around.

So I formally apologize to Ms. Uma Thurman. I stress that I never once implied that you were some sort of rabid fan of mine or the show. Oh, what you must thought of me. That is, if in fact you gave it any thought at all.

Oh, and P.S. --  that photo of me and Lucy that was used for AVENUE Q promotion for years...is flipped. I am not left-handed. That wasn’t TV Guide’s fault...that’s how the photo was initially printed. It’s not a big deal. I just figured, as long as I was here...

forgetting sarah marshall, 2008

I was not in this film.

I would have loved to have been in this film. I would have loved to have auditioned for this film. But I was not in the film, and apparently they only auditioned LA puppeteers. I knew nothing about it until it came out.

Many people, including dear friends who have known me for years, assumed it was me, swore it was me, and told others it was me. It was even on IMDB.

It was not me. I wish it was. But it was not.

Lesson to us all: other brunette puppeteers exist.

regarding online bios and such

Because I have a website and some semblance of a life, and also because I did not create it, I do not update the Wikipedia page that was made about me, and I don’t think it has been touched in a couple of years. Because I have not been on the Broad Way in some time, my bio on Playbill.com is woefully out of date. Because...well, I don’t know the why to that because, but for whatever reason, my credits on BroadwayWorld.com are somewhat lacking. And IMDB is always to be taken with a huge tub of salt.

Should you have any reason to research my credits, please use this website as your primary source. My resume is pretty complete, for the most part, particularly regarding any work I’ve done in the past ten years. Although, I have left off the puppet pilots I’ve done, as well as unaired presentation pilots. Because that just sends people to YouTube. Badness.